HeyHo Here We go!
by Pathatlon
Summary: FINSISHED! - A situation which can only be dealt with when drunk! What will happen if you put Herm and Sev into a room with alcohol? Here's the answer!
1. default

Disclaimer:  
  
Any character you recognise from the World of Harry Potter belongs to J.K Rowling. I do not make any profit from it, it's purely entertainment.  
  
Please review  
  
Hundreds of cloaked features were making their way towards the carriages that was waiting for them. Every single one had pulled their hoods over their head, as a shelter from the heavy and furious rain. Hermione, Harry and Ron got one of the last carriages because of Hermiones obsession, with making sure the little first years met Hagrid and that no one was left behind.  
  
"I'm soaked!" Ron said annoyed as he took a seat in the mouldy carriage. "Hagrid always makes sure that everyone is following him, we didn't have to!"  
  
"I, Ron, you didn't do anything! I just want to set a good example; you don't even care about your title. I'm head girl now. I am very displeased with Malfoy, he just left as one of the first ones!" Hermione exclaimed and shuddered a bit to let the water, fall off her cloak. "Did you see him? He shoved one of the boys away so that he could get the first carriage!" Hermione said dramatically,  
  
"He's head boy too, you know. He ought to behave!"  
  
"Hermione, leave it. He will never change, for gods sake he's a Slytherin..." Harry informed and let his hood fall.  
  
"You know what I'm looking forward to?" Harry then said with a strange smirk.  
  
"What?" Ron asked and glanced out the window to see when they'd be there.  
  
"We're seventh years now, remember. What's happening on your seventh year?" Harry smirked more obviously.  
  
"Oh yeah, that marriage thing!" Hermione exclaimed with a hint of annoyance. Ron's head reddened.  
  
"I doubt that there's anyone for me..." He said looking down the hay in the carriage.  
  
"Of course there is! It's Hermione we should be worried about," Harry let out a laugh and Hermione sent him a cold glare. "Why so mad, Herm? You love this idea!"  
  
"Yes I do, but as you said yourself, there's probably no one in there for me... I just don't want to end up with someone who don't like the same things as me, school, books etc..." Hermione sighed sadly and bit her lip cautiously.  
  
The Marriage was something that had existed since Hogwarts was established. It was something that happens on ones seventh year, after the welcomes ceremony of the first years. The hat would shout out a name of the seventh years and then shout out the person who was the closest match. It forced people to meet others instead of their usual 'gang'. It was a really good idea too. There was almost never any complains. Normally in the beginning there was, but then people got to know each other and realised how much they would have in common. Well of course they would have a lot in common, otherwise the hat wouldn't have chosen the two to be together... The same happened with the teachers, though they usually never ended up with a student. Actually, Hermione had read that that had only happened around 300 hundred years ago. It was some young teacher and a student. Her stomach ached strangely; professor Snape was never paired with anyone. God forbid it to happen today! Hermione thought.  
  
"You now Herm. You really could use a social life, maybe this is the way to go..." Ron said smirking. Hermione looked at him coldly. "I am sure you'll find someone too... There has to be a student just as obsessed with books and school like you..." Both Harry and Ron laughed and Hermione gave them a very sarcastic giggle.  
  
"So, Harry... that includes you too you know. You're dating Ginny and all..." Hermione sure wiped the smile off of Harry.  
  
"You know that's not funny. She'll be pissed..." Harry informed and Ron nodded darkly next to him.  
  
"Yeah, she'll rip you into a million pieces... You best hope you end up with someone we know real good, then we might make a deal or something..." Ron informed knowingly.  
  
Harry had been dating Ginny since the start of their sixth years and was really happy with her. But, Ginny had a thing of getting a bit... jealous. Hermione remembered when Harry, Ron and her had been out having fun. That night Ginny broke down crying. When Hermione finally got her to tell what was wrong, she was surprised to hear that Ginny was jealous of the relationship Hermione had with Harry. Hermione used, at least, two hours making sure that she would never have a relationship with Harry. Ginny and Hermione was best friends, Hermione had felt really odd when Ginny refused to tell what she was crying about...  
  
The carriage stopped in front of the entrance and Hermione, Harry and Ron flew out into the storm with their robes closely around them, and hurried up the staircase. The dream team entered the Great Hall and hurried to take a seat.  
  
"What if you're gay?" Harry suddenly asked, "or what if you're not but get paired with a guy... what if I get paired with Malfoy?" He shuddered terrified. Hermione let out a laugh.  
  
"That would seriously be hilarious!" She laughed and Ron laughed too.  
  
"What if you get paired with him?" Harry spat in a weak attempt to stop her from laughing.  
  
"That will very likely happen, he's nowhere near my standard," she smirked happily, "you're actually the complete opposite of him... He's evil, you're good..." Hermione trailed of with a small chuckle.  
  
"Suppose you could end up with Neville then," Ron informed casually from the seat next to her. Hermione stopped laughing at stared at Neville who sat some seat away.  
  
"That sure made you shut up," Harry laughed and gave Ron five.  
  
The sorting ceremony began. Hermione was looking around the Great Hall as to see if there was anyone there might match her standard.  
  
"You know, that guy over there in Ravenclaw, Terry Boot, he's quite clever..." Hermione told her two friends thoughtfully.  
  
"Hermione, relax..." Harry whispered. The ceremony was close to an end and Hermione was getting more nervous for every second there went. Finally Dumbledore stood up.  
  
"Welcome back, welcome back!" He said cheerfully and looked out the large crowd that had their gazes turned towards him. "As you now, the first years are about to find out, we at Hogwarts has a tradition for pairing the seventh years. It's not bound to make you love each other, merely to become friends..." he chuckled lightly, "I do expect you to try and get the best out of this, just like the former seventh years got..." Dumbledore went over to the hat that sat on the stool. "Now, the hat doesn't call your name in alphabetical order, it just... calls your name..." once again he chuckled lightly and Hermione noticed a few first years look at each other sceptical. Yep, she remembered when doing that too.  
  
Somebody was yelling something out loud, "what about the teachers?"  
  
Once again Dumbledore was chuckling lightly, "yes, yes. The teachers are going through this every year too, but it usually happens when every one has left the Great Hall..." he smiled brightly and his words seemed to calm the seventh years down a bit. At least the teachers were doing it too...  
  
Hermione noticed a lot of whisper around the tables; yes she knew what they were whispering about. There were being whispered about it at the Gryffindor table too.  
  
"Couldn't it be fun if Snape was going to live with professor Sprout, or TRELAWNEY?" The whole Gryffindor table broke into laughter that caused many people to stare at them.  
  
"As you've heard through every year when I've introduced this little game, you will share a room with another person, it contains a bathroom, kitchen, living room and bedroom. If you do have a girl – or boyfriend then the hat will place you together even though the person is not in seventh year." He paused for a second, "and you will be eating together too. You can sit wherever you like through lunch, but breakfast and dinner will be spent sitting next to the partner selected. This is a marriage game, so you will share surname, but it doesn't necessarily mean that you have to end up falling in love with each other," Dumbledore paused and tapped the hat gently with his wand. Harry looked relieved.  
  
The hat gave a small jump in the stool before spitting out two haloes that flew around in the Great Hall before settling above two people.  
  
"Miss Hanna Abbott and Mr. Dean Thomas," Dean and Hanna smiled weakly to each other and Dumbledore told them to come up to him to be told where to go and live. The two people left the Great Hall carefully with every single student watching them interested.  
  
The hat spat out two haloes again, which flew around before stopping above Harry Potter and Ginny Weasley. Both people got up and headed towards Dumbledore. Hermione soon noticed how empty the hall had gotten, wouldn't she be picked out too? A strange feeling was rumbling inside of her, she felt like throwing up. The hat spat out two haloes that stopped above Ron Weasley and Lavender Brown who both blushed but nonetheless smiled satisfied. Hermione gasped as one of the following haloes settled above Terry Boot. She looked at the second halo, it stopped at the Slytherin table, she raised an eyebrow surprised. Millicent Bullstrode. She looked at Terry coldly but got up. Hermione wondered how those two could be paired.  
  
Every seventh year from Gryffindor had been sorted, except Hermione. Hermione didn't know how many others seventh years there were back. The rest of the school sat watching and she couldn't see if she was the only left. Oh no, she wasn't, Draco Malfoy was sitting at the... No not more, one of the haloes had stopped right above him and the other one was flying around. For a second it moved towards Hermione but then it moved back at the Slytherin table and settles above Pansy Parkinson who smiled greatly. Hermione sighed. The end she was sitting in, where the seventh years sat, was cleared. She felt really miserable. Who would she end up with? She could see there were a few seventh years back, but the precise number was still a mystery.  
  
Hermione nearly fell down her chair as one of the haloes settled above her. She looked up at it; it was kind of pretty. She looked around at the other halo; it was flying around in the Great Hall. Okay after five minutes Hermione was on the edge of screaming. The halo was still flying around not settling above any heads of students.  
  
"Professor Dumbledore!" Hermione said annoyed, she felt close to tears, "I don't think there any..." she trailed of sighing heavily.  
  
"Of course there is miss Granger, sometimes it just takes time," he smiled brightly at her and Hermione resumed watching the halo, which was still flying around madly above them. Then ten minutes went further and Hermione let her head fall to the table with a loud donk, some people looked at her.  
  
"Miss Granger," Dumbledore said and Hermione sat up strait. It seemed that everything had become quiet. She looked out the students, the halo had disappe- Hermione gasped and literally fell down her chair.  
  
"Yes I know it is rather odd, but so let it be, Severus is never picked out when we teachers do this either..." Dumbledore chuckled and Hermione cast a glance at Snape who was sitting stiff in his chair. "Get up, both of you. This year will be quite interesting, don't you think so?" Dumbledore smiled as Hermione got up from the floor. Everyone was looking at her as she quietly made her way towards Dumbledore. "Up you go Severus," Dumbledore instructed, in an almost too sweet voice. For a second Hermione wondered whether Dumbledore had let the halo include the teachers, he probably had, why else did it take so long? Snape rose from his chair looking at Dumbledore with disgust. "Don't look so bad Severus, you might find some... qualities in miss Granger that you might appreciate..." He chuckled and Hermione could hear some of the students laugh. That was until Snape looked at them. Dumbledore was perfectly fine with pairing a student and a teacher while some of the other teachers looked quite horrified.  
  
"Now, miss Granger and Severus. Severus you will be sharing your private rooms will miss Granger..."  
  
"Albus, as you said... PRIVATE..."  
  
"Yes, but not anymore. Here," Dumbledore chuckled again and handed over a small piece of paper to Hermione and then he sent them off. Snape hurried towards the exit and Hermione tried to follow while trying to figure out what had just happened. She saw Snape go through a door across from the doors to the Great Hall. She hurried after him.  
  
"Dammit, stupid bastard!" Hermione muttered as she thought she had lost track of him. Then she saw him climb through a wall and she hurried after. She was lucky to reach the wall before closing, it seemed that he had hoped she wouldn't make it. "You certainly didn't have to wait," she said sarcastic and breathless. Snape wheeled around surprised to find her in his room.  
  
"And here I thought I had lost you," he said cruelly and lit the light. She was just about to respond when the room caught her eye. She gaped surprised.  
  
"Wauw..." She mumbled and looked around. He was into art. Paintings were hanging on the walls around the room. It seemed to be his living room; a small coffee table was in the corner surrounded by nice looking couches and chairs. There was a dinner table with four chairs and some other things. Snape looked at Hermione as she walked around. She walked through a doorframe into another room; it was filled with books. Hermione immediately hurried over to the first bookshelf.  
  
"What do you think you're going miss Granger?" Snape asked and followed her.  
  
"Inspecting my new quarters," she said smirking and got out a book from the shelf. Snape strode over to her and grabbed the book from her, and carefully placed it back on the shelf.  
  
"I think not..." He said and gave her his most frightened look. "That way..." he pointed into the living room and Hermione sighed mutely and went in there. Hermione stopped at the sight of her trunk and her cat sitting on top waiting.  
  
Hermione saw him stop and look at the cat annoyed. Her things had already been sent to his quarters. "I'll take the couch..." she muttered quietly and opened her trunk to get her PJ. Snape didn't say anything; he was still annoyed. He moved into his bedroom and changed while Hermione was changing in the bathroom. Then he hurried to tug himself under the nice and warm duvet. Hermione was standing in his bathroom, she was still wearing her wet cloak and she was still hooded. She let the cloak fall to the floor and looked at herself. Maybe if he saw her new look he would change his mind? Hermione caught herself thinking and immediately gave herself a mental slap. Her brown hair had definitely been tamed. She shook her head and her hair cascaded down her back. She had gotten beautiful curls. She was pretty. She got on her PJ and walked out from the bathroom. She looked around the room; he was gone. Or? It seemed he had already gone to bed. She sighed and conjured a blanket and lay down on the sofa before turning off the light off with her wand.  
  
Hermione woke around seven and got up. Her back was hurting a bit. The sofa was comfortable, just not in the long run. She glanced into the bedroom of his; she could see his feature lying in the bed. She went into the bathroom and got undressed and then she then took a shower. It was nice shower, short but nice. She didn't want to wake Snape up, she wasn't sure if he was the morning type of person. She then did her hair. It took her ten minutes and her hair had smashing long curls again and then she got dressed. She opened the door gently as if making sure it wouldn't make any noise.  
  
"See your finished occupying the bathroom," Snape sneered and Hermione nearly had a heart attack. She looked at Snape and then hurried away from him and into the living room. She folded the blanket she had slept with neatly, and laid it in the end of the sofa.  
  
---  
  
Severus had woken up at seven and got up. He glanced at the empty couch where a blanket lay ruffled together. He went towards the bathroom where he expected her to be. And she was. He could hear her turn of the shower and then there went around ten more minutes until she came out.  
  
"See you're finished occupying the bathroom," he sneered at her and watched her hurry into the living room. He entered the bathroom, she looked different, he noted. She had gotten pretty curl- no! Damn little Gryffindor, she's not going to stay here! I am going to have to talk with Albus! Snape told himself and then headed for shower.  
  
---  
  
Hermione wasn't that scared of Snape, no. He just had a thing for surprises, like in the bathroom minutes before. He had surprised her. He wasn't interested in waiting in the living room, no, he had to stand next to the door, so when she opened she would meet him and get a shock. She knew he would ask Dumbledore for a solution, if none came up, then what? Hermione wasn't sure if she could stand sleeping in the couch for a year. She looked at her watch it was seven thirty, dinner would be served at eight and then classes would start at nine. She sighed and decided to find her books.  
  
Hermione noticed the piece of parchment she had received from Dumbledore, it seemed to be guidelines for this game.  
  
Behave. If there are any problems, do contact me right away. I expect you will all be nice towards one another. Albus Dumbledore  
  
Hermione shuddered; she knew every person had gotten this note, but the thought of Snape being nice to her... She shuddered lightly again.  
  
Crookshanks was meowing and Hermione conjured a bowl of water and food for him. Her books were spread around in her trunk, but she managed to find every single one of them and then put them in her bag along with some quills and some ink. 15 minutes until dinner. Snape used just as long time in the bathroom as she did, what was he doing in there? Hermione let out a small giggle, making sure to look dreadful and evil, she told herself and placed her schoolbag on the floor next to the couch.  
  
"Having fun?" A voice asked and Hermione wheeled around surprised. She gave him a bright smile, though a bit nervous.  
  
"Actually I am," she told him trying sound less surprised than she was. She followed Snape gaze that ended at her cat, "this is Crookshanks," she told him and the orange cat looked up from the bowl of food at the sound of its name. He gave a short cry before resuming his breakfast. Snape raised and eyebrow and headed towards the exit. Hermione grabbed her schoolbag and followed him silently, though this time she let him disappear without her following him. She didn't want to follow him. He was a complete bastard. She thought that it didn't care how he treated her, but this was too much. Let her sleep on the couch, first thing in the morning was to sneer at her and he didn't even bother to wait up. And that screwed up way he had looked at her cat on! Well at least he hadn't taken any points from her... She walked around for five minutes trying to find the staircase leading up from the dungeons, and finally she managed to find it.  
  
She entered the Great Hall, she sighed relieved, no one noticed her. Maybe she could just... slip down at the Gryffindor table unnoticed. Surely Snape wouldn't care if she didn't sit with him. She smiled and walked towards the Gryffindor table.  
  
"Miss Granger," a voice rang out and Hermione froze. She managed to turn around and look up at the headmaster. "Remember what I said yesterday, breakfast and dinner will be spent with your partner," he chuckled and a lot of people looked at her, mostly the other seventh years. Hermione turned red, as Dumbledore pointed at a free chair next to Snape. Hermione walked slowly up to the head table while trying to ignore the stares from every single student. Harry and Ron was looking at her, they were sitting together along with their partners. Hermione walked up the three stairs leading to the head table, and then took a seat next to Snape.  
  
"As many of you have noticed, miss Granger is sitting up here. She's been selected to have professor Snape as her partner," Hermione looked down her plate and tried not to look at anyone. After a couple of minutes McGonagall spoke.  
  
"Mrs. Snape," she said with great amusement in her voice... Hermione looked up and was handed a timetable for her classes. Hermione gathered a few things from the table and ate a bit of it. She had completely lost her appetite. This wasn't funny! She complained inside of her head. She poked some scrambled egg around on her plate before excusing herself from the table. Once again people stared after her when leaving the Great Hall, was it because of her new look? Maybe a bit, but mainly because of her new status, Mrs. Snape!  
  
"Hello Mrs. Snape," a voice rang out as she entered the double lesson in transfiguration.  
  
"Hello professor McGonagall," Hermione answered sweetly and went to get a seat as far behind as possible. Harry and Ron joined her quickly. She cast a last glance at McGonagall who smirked at her mysteriously.  
  
"What happened yesterday?" Ron asked quietly. Hermione pretended not to hear him until he asked again.  
  
"Just... waited... it tried to find a student for me, but there was no one matching... then it went for the teachers and... well..." Hermione trailed off mutely and got out her transfigurations book.  
  
The following lesson was a double in Charms. She was glad that they would not have potions before Friday afternoon. 1st of September had landed on a Wednesday and the first day of school would be Thursday. Monday, Wednesday and Friday they would have potions.  
  
The first day was stressing. Hermione stayed away from the dungeons until it was curfew. She slept on the couch and her back was getting more hurt by each night. By the time it was Friday Hermione was so tired of everything and decided that she would not accept it anymore.  
  
Hermione walked with Harry and Ron down to the dungeons and took a seat as far away as possible from the front. Snape entered the room like he did always, his robes billowing around him and with an evil expression on his face.  
  
Hermione spent that lesson trying to avoid the professor as best as possible, she didn't even raise her hand when a question was asked. Though she really wanted to, she was too nervous. In her mind she was forming a plan, but she doubted that things would go scheduled once hell had broken loose. They were all going to make a potion for Madam Pomfrey and Harry, Ron and Hermione stood next to each other as always while trying to keep their voices down when speaking.  
  
"Where do you sleep?" Ron whispered while he slices some roots for their potion. "You don't really sleep in the same bed, do you?"  
  
"No!" Hermione said annoyed, "I don't want to talk about it, the man's a..." Whatever cruelty she would call Snape was interrupted.  
  
"5 points miss Granger for talking in class," Snape spoke from the front of the classroom and Hermione shot him a cold glare. Hermione added her roots to her potion and then headed for the students cabinet to get some ingredients.  
  
"This must be the first lesson where he haven't taken points from me," Harry whispered lowly.  
  
"Quiet," Hermione hissed through gritted teeth.  
  
"Miss Granger that will be 10 points from Gryffindor, do shut up unless you want to loose more points..." Snape smirked and went over to check up on the Slytherins. Hermione just stood frozen to the ground, how dared he act like that? She thought to herself.  
  
Harry and Ron glanced at her carefully. Hermione had quickened up and was almost finished. She was furious.  
  
"Stupid bastard," she mumbled under her breath and poured her potion into two flagons and name tagged them. She then gathered her stuff, they were allowed to leave when finished, and then cleaned up.  
  
"Here, Sir," Hermione said kindly and put down one of the flagons neatly on the table in front of him. She gave him an almost too sweet smile, and turned around to leave. She smiled to herself when she heard a small clonk that meant Snape had "accidentally" pushed her potion on the floor to break. She turned around to face him.  
  
"Oops," he said innocently with a small smile playing on his lips.  
  
"You are so predictable, I hardly expected you to do anything else but that," she laughed coolly by his expression, and got out the other flagon and placed it in the box herself. "See you at dinner honey-pie," Hermione giggled sweetly and left with the entire class gaping after her.  
  
Hermione quickened her pace as she had left the potions room.  
  
"What do you think you're doing?" Ron and Harry asked as they caught up with her, just as she had reached the staircase leading up from the dungeons.  
  
"I don't know what you're talking about," Hermione said with an innocent voice and tilted her head sweetly while a small smile played on her red lips.  
  
"What's gotten in to you?" Harry asked confused by his best friend's act.  
  
"I hardly expect Dumbledore to let Snape and me off from this game. I don't know how to act anymore. He is such an arsehole! Seriously! This morning he treated me like, like!" Hermione said a strong noise of disapproval, "he sneered at me as the first things in this morning, and he let me sleep on the couch!" Hermione informed coldly, "I won't tolerate this anymore, I'll show him what happens when messing with Hermione Granger!" 


	2. 2

**Disclaimer:  
  
Any character you recognise from the World of Harry Potter belongs to J.K Rowling. I do not make any profit from it, it's purely entertainment.  
  
Please review  
**

**There might be some grammatical mistakes, most of them is because that they are drunk and can't talk, but there's probably a few real ones too. My native language is not English so i hope you will and can look past those few mistakes there are. Thank you.******

Chapter two  
  
Okay, Hermione had no idea what she should to about Snape, but she wouldn't let him win! When Snape finally entered the Great Hall and headed for the head table, he shot Hermione a vicious glare, which she had expected him to do. She smiled sweetly, and gave shot him an air kiss before turning back to her lunch. The man looked absolutely horrified and turned his gaze elsewhere. Hermione smirked.  
  
"Hermione, that was sickening, why did you do that? It's only make you get in trouble," Ron said nervously and glanced up at the sour professor.  
  
"I really don't care. I am absolutely careless what he'll do. He's not going to get away with treating me like that!" Hermione informed in a cold voice. "I am so going to have fun this year," she laughed viciously.  
  
"Oy, Hermione, you've been paired with professor Snape," Lavender said out loud and the seventh years from Gryffindor turned their gazes towards her.  
  
"Yes, it's quite true" Hermione admitted wile blushing a bit.  
  
"He's something, isn't he?" Lavender asked dreamily looking up at the potion master.  
  
"Yes, he is" Hermione agreed, "A complete moron," Hermione informed and most of the people laughed. "There's a lot of girls that fancies him, isn't there?" Hermione asked before pouring another glass of pumpkin juice.  
  
"Suppose so, heard a lot of girls from Slytherin, talk madly about him, that was just before the end of last year," Seamus said thoughtfully and looked at the professor.  
  
"Well, he is kind of mysterious," Neville spoke and all of the seventh year Gryffindors looked at him. "Not that I like him!" He hurried to say, "it just I've heard that girls like such types... Like you said, Seamus, the Slytherin girls are all crazy about him..." Neville blushed lightly.  
  
"Actually, Neville is quite right," Lavender spoke. "I've heard Ravenclaws, Hufflepufs and Slytherins talk about him, he's very fancied by the girls of Hogwarts," Lavender informed highly.  
  
"That goes for you too?" Hermione asked and they all laughed. Lavender mumbled something quietly.  
  
"So it's only our Hermione that doesn't fancy him, she got her books instead," Lavender smiled sweetly at Hermione. Hermione ignored Lavender and finished her lunch before headed towards the library, before the day's last class in Magical Creatures and DADA.  
  
After the day's last class Hermione hurried to the library again.  
  
"Hello Hermione," Hermione looked up from the book she was reading in.  
  
"Ginny, sit down," Hermione said and moved some of her things.  
  
"What are you doing?"  
  
"Homework..." Hermione wrote something down in a small notebook. "What about you?"  
  
"Just... hanging around... Haven't gotten the chance to talk with you about you being paired with Snape," she tried to hide a smile.  
  
"That's Professor Snape. Yes, unfortunately," Hermione said without stopping her writing.  
  
"Come on Herm, you must find him interesting, just a bit..." Ginny pushed and finally Hermione looked up form her notes.  
  
"Actually yes. I fancy his brilliance," Hermione smiled to prove her friends wrong on the point of her being hopeless about boys. Ginny sighed heavily.  
  
"Hermione! Don't you think he's sexy or something?"  
  
"The man's a monster. He has no respect for me. A man that has such an attitude is not worthy my admiration," Hermione informed simply and began taking more notes.  
  
"Well, the hat put you together for a reason, and..."  
  
"We might have things in common, but that doesn't change his personality," Hermione cut in ending the discussion. There was a pause where Hermione just sat writing and Ginny just stood doing nothing.  
  
"Well, I have some homework to do too... see you at dinner," Ginny said slowly and left.  
  
Hermione closed the books that lay around her on the table. She had finished her homework in Magical Creatures. It was NEWT year, and Hermione had taken every single subject on NEWT standard, even Magical Creatures. Harry and Ron had done the same, except Divination and Magical Creatures. The dinner bell rang, Hermione sighed at gathered her things. This was a nightmare.  
  
She entered the Great Hall ten minutes later and quietly made her way up to the head table. It was odd sitting up there, looking down at all the student. She shuddered lightly and took her seat next to Snape.  
  
"Miss Granger," Dumbledore greeted happily as she took a seat, "well Mrs. Snape for now," he said with a twinkle in his eye. Yep, she hadn't been allowed to leave Snape. Snape scowled as he heard Dumbledore use the name _'Mrs. Snape'_. "How's your day been? Comfortable? I do hope you an Severus made the best out of being put together like this," he said amused.  
  
"Not really, but I feel a change in the wind," Hermione smirked mysteriously and Snape shot her a scared glare.  
  
"Good, good," Dumbledore chuckled.  
  
"Mrs. Snape," McGonagall called from a few seats down.  
  
"Yes, professor?" Hermione answered with a true female voice. You could almost see fire in Severus's eyes when Hermione responded when being called 'Mrs Snape'.  
  
"I've forgotten to tell you that the new look of yours really suits you. When did you change?" McGonagall questioned politely.  
  
"Well, over the vacation actually... Just thought I needed something new, so I decided to learn how to control my hair..." Hermione smiled sweetly and shook her head lightly to free her hair. It cascaded down her back gracefully in beautiful curls.  
  
"It really suits you," Flitwick said joining the conversation and Hermione couldn't help but blush.  
  
"Don't you think so too, Severus?" Dumbledore asked and Snape looked up.  
  
"No..." He lied in a cold sneer and returned to his dinner.  
  
"Professor Snape, I was wondering whether it would be possible to get the new password to your rooms..." Hermione asked and Snape looked up from his dinner.  
  
"Mrs. Snape!" Dumbledore chuckled, "you two should use his given name, except in class naturally," Dumbledore said sweetly and some of the teachers giggled, "And it's your rooms too now." Snape seemed to blush a dull red from anger and Hermione decided to make him blush from embarrassment.  
  
"Yes headmaster. Of course I could try and figure out the code by myself. As I told you in class, just after you let the flagon with my potion fall to the ground an ruin, you are quite _predictable_, I'm sure it is something involving pureblood or potions," Hermione said trying to pretend she wasn't scared. Snape stared at her furiously.  
  
"Mrs. Snape, you're absolutely right, the password is _Blood Potions_," Dumbledore informed her chuckling while watching Snapes expression. As headmaster he was informed of the passwords to most of the rooms. Snape was clutching his fork rather tight; Hermione had him just where she wanted him. He wasn't able to take any points from her, not in front of the headmaster.  
  
"Did Severus really ruin the flagon with your potion in?" McGonagall asked with a strict voice while looking at Snape coldly. He was trapped, he knew it. Blasted Gryffindor!  
  
"Yes, it was an _'accident'_" Hermione said sweetly making sure when saying 'accident' it sounded more sarcastic, "but as I also told before, _Severus_," she tried to smother a laugh, "is a bit predictable so I had made sure to put my potion in two flagons..." Hermione looked at Snape out the corner of her eye. She had used his given name, god it was odd! "If you'll excuse me, I think I'll go make myself _comfortable _in my new quarters..." Hermione said goodbye and left the Great Hall.  
  
It took Hermione ten minutes to find her private rooms. The dungeons looked the same, but she had managed to locate the gargoyle of some kind of beast that guarded his entrance, anyway.  
  
"A beast, how appropriate," Hermione said looking at the gargoyle, "Blood potion," Hermione told and the gargoyle moved and revealed a door. She lit the light in the rooms and decided that she really would make herself comfortable. She moved her books into the library where she made place for her books on one of the shelves. Then she headed into the bathroom to leave her personal things, and the she went to the bedroom and opened two great closets, both containing his cloths.  
  
"What the -?" Hermione asked as she looked inside his closets. There were only black robes.  
  
"Okay, live with it..." Hermione mumbled and made his robes from one of the closets, to fly into the other one. She looked at the drawers, dared she open them? What if she found a pair of his shorts? She shuddered and carefully opened one of the first drawers in the empty closet; it was empty. She sighed relieved and opened those beneath; those were empty too. Hermione looked at the drawers in the other closet, she just wanted to see if his underwear was in them... He didn't walk around naked, did he? Hermione opened the first drawer slowly and breathed out, happy to find a something lying in there. She closed it again.  
  
She swung her wand and her robes flew into the closet and her underwear and socks flew into the drawers. Then she turned towards the bed. "I am not going to sleep on the couch tonight," she told herself and went into the living room. It was nice to have unpacked. She stopped and bit her finger lightly, 'he isn't here,' she told herself and went into the library. It only took seconds before she had found an interesting book and had begun reading in it. Hermione took a seat in a couch, which stood in the library, and began reading.  
  
"What are you doing _miss _Granger?" A voice said from the doorframe, Hermione didn't look up.  
  
"Reading," she answered simply without taking her eyes off the letters, "and that's Mrs. Snape or Hermione..." Hermione smiled gently and glanced up at him. He turned to walk away. "You'll notice," she said catching his attention, "that I've made myself comfortable," she smiled sweetly to him before turning her gaze into the book again.  
  
"What do you mean?" He asked and walked quietly into the room she sat in. She didn't answer right away. She noticed he was getting impatient. She looked at her watch; it was late, almost eleven. She closed the book and got up.  
  
"Nothing much," she answered lightly and passed him gracefully. She walked into the bedroom and opened the closet with her cloths and got out her PJ. He looked at her furiously, but she pretended not to notice. She walked into the bathroom and changed and then she went into the bedroom where Snape was still standing.  
  
"Coming to bed?" She asked silky and went over to the right side of the bed and tugged herself under the nice warm duvet.  
  
"What are you doing?" He asked alarmed.  
  
"You didn't expect me to sleep on the couch, did you love?" She gazed him sweetly.  
  
"I am not going to sleep in the same bed as you!" Snape sneered furiously.  
  
"You'll be sleeping on the couch then?" She closed her eyes, "unlit the light, will you darling?" Hermione asked trying her best not to giggle.  
  
"What did you just call me?" Snape asked and Hermione noticed he was nearby explosion.  
  
"We are supposed to be married, are we not?" She turned around in the bed making her more comfortable.  
  
"THAT'S IT! YOU'RE NOT GOING TO SLEEP IN MY BED!" Snape roared angrily.  
  
"What is your problem?" Hermione sat up strait, "You are such a moron! The way you treat me! I haven't done anything to you! I've even slept on the couch! We're stuck together and if you're going to hate me and treat me with disrespect, then!" Hermione got out of bed, "I'll sleep on that fucking couch," she found her slippers, "if the girls of Hogwarts were in my position, then they'd change their opinion about you!" She said quietly and passed him. Snape stood thunderstruck in some minutes before walking into the living room where Hermione lay in a couch with a sheet around her.  
  
"What do you mean about the girls of Hogwarts?" He asked looking at her. She opened her eyes with a sigh.  
  
"They are oh so crazy about you... so mysterious and so sexy..." said Hermione with the dullest and careless voice she could muster, before she closed her eyes again.  
  
"And you don't think I'm..." he trailed off.  
  
"As Lavender informed me, my love life is with my books..." she still had her eye closed. "Every year Harry and Ron had blamed you for being evil. I've told them to trust you and I've told them that there's a reason for the way you act..." she opened her eyes slightly, "I am ashamed to admit that I thought you would be different when just getting to know you... I guess I was wrong," she turned over so that she gazed into the couch.  
  
"You don't know me, so how the hell can you have an op..."  
  
"I can't get to know you," Hermione cut him off, "you won't let me. You won't let anyone close. Probably because too much self pity..." Hermione mumbled and knew she had made a mistake.  
  
"_Self pity_?" Snape asked in his most dangerous voice he could ever. Hermione turned to face him; she sat up in the couch.  
  
"Yes," they gazed into each other's eyes. "You think you deserves hell because of your past, but you're wrong. You've done so much good, you do so much good. You won't realise that it is your turn to be happy," she took a deep breath.  
  
"What makes you think that that's how I feel?" He asked silky.  
  
"The way you act. You've probably done a lot of horrible things, raped, murdered. But you've paid your dept. This doesn't mean that you should forget what you've done, it means that you should live and be happy, get a family, whatever" she was nervous, did it really mean that? She had no idea.  
  
"What makes you think that I even want to be happy? Get a family?"  
  
"That's what life is all about, being happy. If you're happy being alone, hating yourself for your past, then, by all means, stay miserable," she said plainly. There was a pause where Snape just stood watching Hermione closely. "I don't say I understand how you feel, because I don't. I just think you should remember that there are people who care about you. You're not alone," Hermione breathed out and lay down on the couch again. She closed her eyes, but behind her eyelids she could see his frame. He was still standing there? Hermione opened her eyes looking into his eyes.  
  
"If you want to know who's here for you, then it's not just Dumbledore. The entire Order..." Snape snorted by the mentioning of the Order, "**_I _**am here for you. I may not understand what you're going through, but if you want to talk, then I am here... That is if you'll start changing your attitude towards me..." She gave him a curt smile and sat up once more. "You've always seen me as an obnoxious little miss-know-it-all, but I am more than that. I have feelings. While you try and kill yourself through sorrows of your past, then you seem to forget that people have feelings and when you sneer, like you did this morning, I get hurt..." She looked down the floor, what the fuck was she doing? Why did she tell him her feelings? "This is not important," she said and lay down on the couch and closed her eyes.  
  
"You are quite right," he said in a voice, which mood she was unable to depict. Hermiones stomach jolted, he didn't find her feelings important. "I've seem to have forgotten to live..." Hermione opened her eyes shocked just to see her potion master slip into a chair. "I've raped and killed, my life is quite meaningless... The only person who really cares for me is that blasted man, Dumbledore," he chuckled slightly before turning into a scowl again. "You are the first one beside him who has offered to listen," he shut up thinking of what he was doing. "Goodnight," he got up.  
  
"Wait," Hermione had gotten up too. "Please continue, I want to know, I want you to tell me... I want to be there for you," Hermione told rapidly without breathing. She could suddenly see what the girls of Hogwarts saw in the greasy potion master. He definitely had something.  
  
"I don't want to pour my life out in front of a..."  
  
"**Young woman **who you forget wants to help," Hermione broke him off, before he could say anything cruel.  
  
"Exactly," he went into the bedroom and Hermione followed him. He walked over to a small table with different sorts of Scotch and other alcoholically drinks, standing on it. He poured himself a goodnight drink. "Want one," he asked sardonically when he noticed that she was standing behind him.  
  
"Yes please," she answered and he nearly dropped the bottle. Hermione went over a poured a glass to herself. Maybe some booze would open him up. She smiled to herself. "Don't look so dumbfounded. I am of age, I am allowed to have drink..." She smiled and raised her glass in salute. He did the same.  
  
"It would be much better if you just told me how you feel," Hermione said and grabbed the bottle of Scotch and settled herself in the bed. He watched her amused.  
  
"Are you sure you shouldn't be in Slytherin? Trying to get me drunk just to make me open up," he laughed and sipped the Scotch.  
  
"I would never do that," she lied and laughed sweetly. "But it would definitely ease the tension and get us to talk. Maybe you'd find out I'm not as horrible as you've thought..." she smiled and shook the Scotch bottle lightly, "more," she said and looked at him empty glass. He snorted with a small smile and walked over to her, so that she could pour some more into his glass. "And maybe I would find out that you're not that bad either..." she smirked and he raised an eyebrow. "Of course I would never tell anyone about the kind Severus Snape..." she assured with a laugh and sipped her Scotch. Hermione decided it wouldn't be the right time to ask him about his life, until he was completely drunk.  
  
"So... would it kill you to take points from Slytherin?" She said trying to start a conversation.  
  
"No, why would I? The Slytherins are great students with great opportunities..." Snape informed proudly.  
  
"Yeah right..." Hermione giggled, "What is Malfoys grades in potion?"  
  
"Good," he watched Hermione pour another drink to herself.  
  
"Yeah right. He gets better grades than me, I saw it. That it so unfair, he's not that good, is he?"  
  
"Actually no, the boy sucks at potions, but I would never give him bad grades," Snape finally said with a smirk and Hermione looked at him gaping. "Don't look so dumbfounded, you wanted me to open up..." He smirked at her mysteriously as if she had made a huge mistake wanting him to open up. She shook her head.  
  
"Well yes, luckily his grades is pulled down in almost every other subject," she smiled happily.  
  
"Yes it would be bad if he was better than you in school," Snape chuckled and Hermione poured him some more Scotch.  
  
"Most people think I live my life in books and that I have no social life and no opinions..." Hermione said biting her lower lip.  
  
"Opinions? Like that you think I am a moron?" He asked amused and Hermione blushed.  
  
"Yes..." she said with a weak smile.  
  
"So what is it? Social life? You're in a triangle with Potter and Weasley?" He asked with a raised eyebrow and Hermione nearly fell out of bed of laughter. Snape, who had stood up next to the bed, took a seat.  
  
"Why does everyone think I am in a relationship with either Ron or Harry, or both of them?"  
  
"Well you've been friends for seventh years and usually something happens between people..." Snape said and took the bottle of Scotch from Hermione, he poured some for himself.  
  
"Well, I suppose you're right. It's just that were more like a family... Happy little family. They are like my brothers and I'm like their sister," Hermione admitted, "Well Ron's been jealous a few times, like that time in out fourth year with Victor..." She sipped her drink.  
  
"That's kind of disgusting. You see each other as sister and brothers but still you get jealous..." Snape grimaced strangely.  
  
"Not at that time..." She said giggling, "I've never kissed Harry or Ron, well except on the cheeks..." She bottomed the glass and poured some more.  
  
"And what was it about you having a social life?" He asked interested.  
  
"Okay, social life doesn't necessarily mean a love life..." she excused coldly.  
  
"Your best friends are two boys who you have absolutely no personal relationship with?" Snape asked sardonic to make the point.  
  
"Okay I am a loser... I live my life in books. But I love my life, I really do. Even though I'm a bookworm I like to be able to answer every question," she smiled looked dreamily into her glass.  
  
"That explains why you don't see my as a sexy hunk," Snape laughed and Hermione looked at him surprised. "I overheard some Slytherin girl last year talk about me," he explained and Hermione giggled.  
  
"If I didn't know better, I would think you like the attention... oh wait, I don't know better..." she grinned. "It's not only the Slytherins. It is Ravenclaw, Hufflepuf and Gryffindor too. A secret source told me that the person has heard several girls chitchat on the bathroom about you... You are a sexobject for quite a lot girls," Hermione said before she could stop herself. Snape only laughed and Hermione blushed.  
  
"So when you are on the library reading, the girls in your age are in the bathroom chitchatting about who's hot and who's not?" Snape asked thoughtfully, "I always wondered why girls went two and two to the bathroom, now I know. They need to talk while doing their... business..." Both leaned back into the bed and laughed hysterically for some minutes.  
  
"Yes, don't fall off the bed, I've heard rumours that you're in a tie with Draco Malfoy. You two are number one of _"every" _girl's dream..." Hermione snorted followed by another fit of laughter. They both poured some more Scotch into their glass while rocking slightly from side to side.  
  
"Malfoy? I had never expected that. He's not that pretty..."  
  
"Jealous?" Hermione laughed.  
  
"Oh yes, I am so jealous at Draco Malfoy..." Snape said sarcastically.  
  
"Well yes, I hardly find him attractive either... Beside, even if I did he's taken..." Hermione smirked knowingly.  
  
"Maybe I should brew I Poly-Juice potion and become a girl, just to find out what you talk about..." they both laughed hard.  
  
"You..huhuhu..." Hermione laughed, "a girl," she dried her eyes by the mental picture and Severus was laughing hard too.  
  
"Oh my god, Draco is such a babe!" Severus had turned his voice into a high- pitched voice while gesturing femininely with his hands. Both shrieked with laughter.  
  
"So how is it you know all this when you spend you time in the library?" Severus managed to ask when they had gotten a hold in themselves. In between a giggle would erupt though.  
  
"You forget I'm sharing dormitory with the school's most chattering and make-up obsessed two girls, Lavender Brown and Parvati Patil..." She smiled wryly.  
  
"So who is Draco dating? Hopefully not some Gryffindor..." He smirked.  
  
"Pansy Parkinson."  
  
"Well, she's not that bad in potions..." Snape admitted thoughtfully.  
  
"WHAT? Are you judging them on how good they are in potions?" Hermione asked pretending to be outraged.  
  
"Of course," he admitted wickedly.  
  
"So what if I dated him?" Hermione asked interested and Snape shot her a strange glare.  
  
"That would mean I would have to be nice to you..." Said Severus wry.  
  
"That would be the end of the world. Well luckily I'm not dating him. And we're not shagging like bunnies..." Hermione laughed at Severus' facial expression.  
  
"They're shagging like bunnies?" He rose and eyebrow surprised.  
  
"Yes, different sorts of places... Surprised that they haven't been caught yet," Hermione giggled knowingly.  
  
"They're doing it in public?"  
  
"Yes... well that is the most thrilling place to do it," Hermione informed and Snape looked at her amused.  
  
"How do you know that? Hermione," he used her first name to get her to talk. She raised an eyebrow.  
  
"Well, as I told you, Ron was a bit... Jealous of Victor..." She smiled blushing.  
  
"You must tell me more," Snape demanded and leaned up against the pillows in the end of the bed. Hermione giggled.  
  
"Well if you must know, then I've met him loat, lits, loppy," both laughed, "lots of times in the vacations... And we've... done it... several places..." She looked like a tomato. "Your turn," she informed and he looked at her slightly unwilling.  
  
"I hardly think it is appropriate..." He excused.  
  
"I think it is, Severus," she tried to restrain a giggle. "Up a dungeon wall?" She laughed and he looked away. "Oh my, spot-on," Hermione laughed. "Who was it? McGonagall?" Severus looked horrified.  
  
"No. I think I leave her to Dumbledore," and both of them laughed for minutes. "Seventh year..." He said when they had stopped laughing.  
  
"Yes, so many things happens on your seventh year," Hermione said thoughtfully. "Harry and Ginny lives together in this game, something must happen. Harry is a young man, filled with hormones..." Hermione laughed as Severus shuddered.  
  
"Thank you for the image..." he thanked lightly and shuddered an extra time.  
  
"Your precious Draco Malfoy, he's living with his girlfriend too," she smirked and both of them shuddered strongly. "Haha," Hermione laughed, "Colin Creevy, him with the camera, caught Malfoy and Pansy making out in a empty room," Hermione laughed vigorously, "Colin didn't even take a picture, he was in too much shock," Snape laughed and bottomed his glass. Hermione reached for the Scotch bottle that stood on the floor, and poured some for both.  
  
"What about your dear friend Ron?" Snape asked interested in the lives of the students at Hogwarts.  
  
"I'm not sure I should tell you, after all, you are a Slytherin, you might use it against us..." Hermione eyed him suspiciously. "I think you should tell some interesting details of your sexual life," Hermione leaned back and laughed. 


	3. 3

**Disclaimer:**

_Any character you recognise from the World of Harry Potter belongs to J.K Rowling. I do not make any profit from it, it's purely entertainment._

**Please review**

**CHAPTER TREE**

"My sex life is really not that interesting," Severus informed dull.

"Come on Severus, there must be something odd you've done... Have you ever done it on the Quidditch pitch? A place you could get caught?" She smiled innocently.

"Well, beside that dungeons wall, I guess I've done it in the Hogwarts garden," he blushed a dull red, or was it the booze? Hermione tittered.

"The Hogwarts garden? That's a nice place, romantic too..." Hermione said dreamily.

"You planning on doing it in the garden too? I guess I could inform you of the best spot where there's a perfect view," They both laughed and Hermione nearly got some Scotch down wrong.

"Yes please do, but now you're at it, other strange places?" Hermiones asked interested.

"In a bathroom in Hogsmaede, now I believe it is your turn to tell something," Severus said quickly and Hermione raised an eyebrow.

"That wasn't so bad, well that depends what bathroom it was..." She asked sweetly. "The Hogs Head? That strange café called something with R or... What is it called? Madam Piddufu... Piddy Pedda?" Hermione tried.

"Yes, that one, your turn," Hermione laughed.

"That one? The pink fluffy one?" Snape nodded dully and Hermione began rolling in the bed laughing frenziedly. "YOU IN THAT PINK CAFÉ!" She laughed some more and had to dry her eyes in the end.

"Your turn..." He informed and Hermione poured some more Scotch for them both.

"Well..." she paused, "Harry lost his virginity to Cho Chang..." She said trying not to talk about herself.

"That is very interesting and I would love to hear more, but before that, you..." He looked into her eyes and she blushed.

"Well, Victor is a Quidditch player..." she said blushing. "I was allowed to use the Floo to get to Bulgarian and visit him, think it was a year ago, the vacation before sixth year," she paused and they both sipped of their drink, "I was going to a Quidditch training to see him play, and after it... we... just... did it..." she blushed little more. "We had been alone on the Quidditch pitch and then he went to shower and I walked in with him..." She smiled shyly, "it's been a long time since I last saw him. Didn't see him it the summer vacation and I'm not that interested in him anymore. We have nothing in common, he's only into Quidditch, and our conversations get so shallow. Usually it ends with that we shag or something," Hermione looked into her half-full glass of Scotch. "Bottoms up?" She raised her glass towards him to show how much she had let. He had around the same.

"Bottoms up," he said and they both bottomed.

"Quidditch pitch, the shower, elsewhere?"

"Usual places, the bed, the floor, the kitchen, a closet," she trailed off trying not to meet his gaze.

"More?" She poured some more Scotch for them both.

"A closet?" Snape really let out a shark like laugh.

"Yes, we were both... very... excited," she giggled at the expression in Snapes face.

"If poppel, plop, plis," he let out a girlish giggle, "people knew what you've told, you wouldn't be called a dull bookworm, bookmonster, bookhorse, book...something," both giggled again.

"Yes, but that's okay. Then there's more to the imagination," she smiled wickedly to him.

"Yes, who would ever think innocent Hermione Granger being a wild beast in bed... closet, outside, everywhere," Severus spoke amazed and Hermione giggled.

"And you too. Mr Mysterious-sexobject. I'm sure Pansy Parkinson imagines you when shagging with Draco," they both laughed frantically for minutes. "May I throw a spell at you?" She asked with an innocent voice. Severus snorted.

"Which one?"

"The tickling-ickling spell..." 

"I'm already laughing..."

"May I challenge you to a duel?" She got up from the bed, bottomed her glass and found her wand. "I am the greatest dueller in the world," she laughed. "Just not too serious spells," Severus got out of bed too. They both swayed gently in their steps before falling onto the bed, laughing.

"I can't see strait..." Severus moaned sadly and made some odd expressions while trying to focus on Hermione. She laughed at him.

"All the girls want you," her voice sounded so far-away.

"Well I knew a lot of the girls fancy me..."

"Lot of the girls? It's practically everyone," Hermione informed, still giggling. "Have you ever tried a girl show up to detention in mini skirt?"

"Well, I suppose I have... A small skirt and playing with their hair..." He sighed strangely. "But it would be sad to ruin their self-esteem," he smirked before letting out another laugh.

"Yes... You: a real heart breaker. The girls are all over you..." they both chuckled.

There was a nice pause where both of them just enjoyed the company of each other. "Wonder if I'll ever be breath taking..." She mumbled quietly, "It will never be the same like with you guys. One guy can have ten girls hanging over him, in your case 500, but girls, there's really no guy who's hanging over the same girl for a long time. It's all about sex. If they do it, they just want sex."

"That's not all true. Guess many sees guys as sex maniacs, but we can fall in love too, have feelings..." He informed hurt, and Hermione looked at him.

"Have you ever been in love?" She looked into his deep liquorice pools, they were smiling.

"Only small crushes, not breath-taken in love..." They shared the same air.

"Yeah, me neither. At first I really thought Victor was the one," Severus raised an eyebrow, "yes, yes I know, a silly girl's imaginations. But I think that it is every girl's dream: true love and a great wedding and all..."

"People are naïve when it comes to love. When you love some one you feel it will last forever."

"Until that day when you look at your relationship, like I did with Victor. I didn't break up with him because I knew I would never be married with him, we just didn't have anything in common. I like books and knowledge, he like Quidditch and Quidditch..." She smiled cheerfully. "At least I got to be the one who broke up."

"Why did Potter and Chang break up?" Severus asked. He found the conversation really amusing.

"Well, Harry has always liked Cho, but Cho had some... Personal complications..."

"Diggory?"

"Yep. Two years ago when they first time kissed, she had started to cry. Harry told me about it, he is such an arse sometimes. I told him she was confused, Cedric had died and Harry was with him when it had happened. She was confused and felt she betrayed Cedric when being with Harry, that sort of thing... Harry is so dim when it comes to girls, Ron is too..." She sighed thinking of her two friends.

"I can imagine," Severus smiled.

"You have dimples," Hermione realised, "they're not big, almost not there," they were lying close to each other and Hermione could see every fraction of his skin. It was pale, but clean and nice.

"It is really not that difficult to understand women," she informed and Severus snorted.

"You can be a maze..."

"Some girls can," Hermione corrected, "I don't see myself as a maze, but on the other hand, I would never date a guy who had absolutely no experience with women."

"And _Victor_ had?"

"Yes..."

"I suppose you're right. Being a world known Quidditch player, he must've attracted a lot of girls..." Severus agreed and Hermione bit her lip annoyed.

"Yes, I guess so... had sex all the time... I really don't hope I was just _another one_..." she sat up a bit to get a sip of her drink, before lying down next to him again.

"I am sure you weren't," Severus said encouraging, "beside, you have done what no other woman have. You broke up with him, not the other way around. That will keep you fresh in his mind," they both smiled.

"That's the secret of how to make the guy remember you? Do something he had never expected?"

"That's the same with women, isn't it?"

"Naa, girls remember every guy... I think..." Hermione smiled and bottomed her glass. "Guys can be just as confusing as girls though," Hermione said and raised a bit from the bed, to pour some more into both glasses.

"How? I think guys are very easy to figure out," Severus said.

"Sex, sex, sex?" She laughed, "Well, I shouldn't have brought it up, I have no idea of to read men, I've only been with Victor and he was quite easy to lure. It was just an idea I had, that guys have to be confusing too..." she smiled innocently.

"Some are, and some aren't," he said plainly. Hermione nodded.

"It's odd how girls can't shag with everyone like boys can... they can, but not without getting called..." She sighed.

"Yes..."

"Last year there was a guy in Gryffindor, he was with almost every girl in Hogwarts... from fifth year and up, the others were too young... I think," she smiled. "Just mention his name at breakfast tomorrow and you'll see how many girls who looks up," she giggled and shook her head dull.

"Except you of course," Severus pointed out.

"Yes, except me. I was too busy in the library studying. There wasn't even any _important_ exams last year, as Harry and Ron pointed out," she laughed, "they tried to get me on a blind date..."

"With who?" Severus asked interested and opened his eyes wider to show she had his fully attention, she laughed at him.

"Some guy, Ravenclaw, can't remember his name..."

"Didn't you just say that girls remember every guy?"

"I didn't do anything with him. I actually was so surprised that I excused myself immediately and left, poor guy, it was rather cruel..." she sighed forlornly.

"You know, you could take advantage of situations like that," Severus highlighted.

"So I could give you all the sleazy details?" They both laughed and Hermione moved a bit to sit more comfortable.

"Yes," he admitted, which caused another fit of giggles from both of them. They were rolling around on the bed, sipping some of their drink occasionally and then they would laugh and giggle some more.

"Men never ever remember a woman, do they? They just _hop_ on to the next hole..." Snape looked at her surprised, "well it's true isn't it?"

"Put in a rather cold frame, yes," Hermione nodded cleverly, "However," Severus started out slowly, "it is a gentleman's duty to remember the name of the girl he wakes up with," he leaned his head to the side a bit dull, Hermione noticed his glass was empty.

"No more booze," she informed and shook the empty Scotch bottle.

"On the table," he smirked and Hermione got up and fell to the bed again.

"Wow..." she mumbled and giggled. She got up again and stumbled over to the table and got another bottle of something she had no idea what was.

She poured it into their glasses.

"To victory," she said laughing.

"To victory over dried grass," Severus agreed, and they raised their glasses in salute and let them cling together. They both drank it in one shot and shuddered.

"What the fuck is this?" Hermione asked and shuddered.

"I believe you've found my Tequila," he said smirking.

"That's disgusting..." She informed making a strange expression.

"Just relax and sip," he said and did it. Hermione did the same, "you'll get used to it."

"Gudr," she mumbled, "Wonder what people are doing right now..." Hermione questioned quietly.

"Probably sleeping or, after your stories, shagging like bunnies," they both laughed and Hermione sipped some of the Tequila. It had an odd taste, but after a while it had no taste at all. Hermione was drunk, and so was Severus.

"Godaf..." Severus mumbled and laughed along with Hermione.

"Gufaf," Hermione responded and they started to invent their own language.

"Flopper. Floo powder," Severus added and Hermione nodded.

"Yes, I know him very well. I heard he's eating yellow mushrooms in the..." Both laughed before she could finish her sentence.

"You know, Goyle has had a girlfriend too, though I suspect that it was because she wanted to get close to Malfoy..."

"That must be the reason. He's a complete flol... fool, in potions... The only reason he's in NEWT potions is because of his parents, not that there are any good..."

"Thel, they're Death Eaters, aren't they?" Hermione asked followed by a small hiccup.

"Yow..." he answered dimly.

"Crispy, it is rather mysterious... Are you ever scared?" Hermione asked and leaned a bit closer to him.

"Only a fool wouldn't be," he answered and Hermione looked into his eyes. His eyes were blurry and his pupils were big.

"Guess you're right, tell me about it..." Hermione whispered and took a seat right next to him, leaning up against pillows.

"What do you know?" He asked fuzzy.

"You are making his potions..."

"I don't run around with the _others_, I don't rape and kill, I am doing simple things. Though, I have been faced with a muggle that had been tortured. I try my best, in secret, to save those who get captured, it's difficult and sometimes I can't do anything about it. Usually it's women who gets captured and brought back to the _hide out_. They are raped and then killed. That is his pleasure, to torture, rape and then kill the women..." he stopped and looked into Hermiones eyes.

"Sometimes I'm asked to do _jobs_ to show him where my loyalty is..." he said slowly and Hermione knew what he meant with _jobs_.

"It is a bad comfort, but better one than ten. If you follow me..." They were still looking into each other's eyes.

"But that doesn't mean that it's right," he pointed out hazily.

"But it is necessary. If you don't he'll expose you and then you'll be completely lost..." Hermione comforted and sipped her drink and he did too.

"Yes, I hate what I am supposed to do, but on the other hand, I have to do it..."

"You know, Harry got the same problem. He's forced to use the unforgivable no matter what. If he wants the world to be a better place, he has to pull himself together."

Severus let out some air, he damned that Potter kid, well his father...

"You never wanted to have a family?" Asked Hermione after a while where they sat in silence, sipping their drink.

"I suppose I have," he said thoughtfully and scowled lightly, "but as you yourself complained about earlier, it is hard to find someone you can have a long conversation, intellectual as a common conversation," He poured some more brandy for them both.

"Well it's not our fault that we're born with such thirst for brilliance..." Hermione said highly, but a bit blurry too and laughed.

"Hear, hear," Severus raised his glass and she did too.

"There is this really evil professor here at Hogwarts," she purred before ending with a snicker.

"Who?" He asked shocked.

"Professor Snape. The evil potion master," she spoke in a bare whisper and both giggled. 

"I think I've heard of him. Yes, he's a real git. Stupid bastard..." Severus agreed and poured more into their not-very-empty glasses.

"We should do some pranks on him," she giggled and Severus nodded eagerly.

"Yes, we should," he grabbed the tequila bottle and Hermione grabbed two of the largest bottles too and then they grabbed each other's hands and then they flew off.

"Where're we going? I'm still in my PJ," Hermione giggled as the two swayed from side to side in the dungeons. They were arm-locked and both giggling.

"So am I and I don't know. I went outside our quarters, your turn to decide," he slurred.  
  
"To the potion room, batman!" Hermione spoke in a loud sober voice and grabbed him and forced him towards the potion room.

"This is an ugly potion room," he looked around the room, it was too dark for anyone to see anything.

"You can't even see anything..." Hermione laughed.

"I see darkness," he responded and tried to find his wand. "Here," he gave her the bottle, which she began sucking at right away. "Plip!" Severus told the wand, nothing happened, "Luna," he tried again. "Lumos," the light erupted from the tip of the wand, and both narrowed their eyes in protection of the light. Hermione found her own wand and created light too.

"We should make it colourful," Hermione suggested and Severus nodded.

"Yes. Colartus," he pointed at his desk, which turned pink. Hermione spoke another spell and the desk turned into a dog, a pink dog. Both laughed and held around each other for support. Severus drank some more tequila. Ten minutes latter all the things in the room was made into different sorts of animals. "You know," Hermione spoke, still giggling slightly, "Neville owns a toad..." she let the rest flow and then they hurried out of the potion room. 

"Wait, this way," Severus dragged her in another direction. "Pollution," he spoke and the wall melted into a door. "Let's play some pranks on the Slytherins. I've heard evil professor Snape is their head of house..." Both laughed quietly.

"I've heard that too," Hermione admitted and the pair began flicking their wands. Soon the Slytherin common room was painted in Gryffindor colours and a banner hanging above the fireplace showed a picture of Draco Malfoy in a pink miniskirt. Hermione giggled along with Severus as they made their leave. They took in turn to drink some tequila. Hermione had shrunk the other bottles so that she would not drop them, then she had put them in her pocket. "Come," she ordered and the two hurried up from the dungeons.

"Look," Severus flicked his wand towards some sets of armour and they turned into herd of sheep, which left their places to seek happiness elsewhere. Both Hermione and Severus cracking into laughter and fell to the floor.

"Sev!" Hermione gasped as Madam Norris came trotting towards them.

"Blasted cat," Severus hissed at the cat.

"Patrifitos.. Paftr... Petrificus Totalus!" She pointed her wand at the cat, which became stiff right away, and fell to the ground which a soft 'clonk'.

"The evil Filch's cat!" Severus informed her, pretending to be horrified.

"It's conspiracy!" Hermione told him, trying to suppress laughter. 

"My love?" Someone spoke and Hermione gasped. She hurried fetched the cat and hurried to hide in a dark corner. Severus hurried over to cover her with his back. Argus Filch arrived moments later. "Where are you?" He asked in a singsong voice. Hermione giggled and Filch turned towards the corner where Severus stood in his PJ.

"Professor, I did not see you there," Argus told, "did you just giggle?" He thought it was Severus who had giggled and not Hermione since he could not see Hermione.

"I did certainly not," he smiled greatly and Argus stepped back.

"Have you seen Madam Norris?" He was eyeing Severus suspiciously, he had really giggled like a girl?

"That way," Severus pointed in a direction and Argus looked in the direction.

"That way?" Argus questioned, making sure he was looking in the right direction.

"No, that way," Severus spoke and pointed in another direction. Behind Severus Hermione had put down the cat and was holding Severus's arms to guide. She pointed in another direction while speaking with the deepest voice she could muster.

"Sir, your voice. Are you okay?" Argus moved closer.

"Of course I'm fine!" Severus spoke himself and Hermione gestured wildly with his arms and made Argus Filch back away.

"Goodnight, professor," Filch spoke and hurried off without throwing a second glance backwards. Both Hermione and Severus fell to the floor in laughter, literally, when Filch was out of earshot.

"What shall we do with the ugly cat?" Hermione leaned her head against Severus.

"Paint her," he proposed and let a yawn slip. Hermione got up.

"Yes!"

"What?"

"Paint her! Come on Sevii," Hermione grabbed his hand and helped him up from the floor, then she found the tequila bottle, which she had placed next to the cat, drank some and gave it to Severus who followed her lead. Hermione grabbed the cat and both hurried towards the Great Hall by an unspoken idea. 

"Colours!" Severus demanded.

"Pink, yellow, light blue, turquoise," Hermione spoke and Severus giggled before flicking his wand. The poor cat's head turned yellow with pinks spots and it's body turquoise with light blue stripes. Then Hermione used the Wingardium Leviosa spell and the cat hovered some two metres above the Head table, then Severus cast a spell so it would be impossible to get her down before five hours later. Both let out another fit of giggles and supported themselves on each other so they would not fall. Hermione took the bottle away from Severus and drank some, but it was empty.

"Here," she gave it back and found the two other bottles and turned them into the right sizes. Then they both reeled off with a bottle each after having banished the tequila bottle.

"Wait," Severus turned towards the Great Hall before leaving completely. "We should do something about this ugly hall," he suggested with a titter.

"You're right," Hermione agreed. She flicked her wand and the hall turned purple. Severus flicked his wand too and the tables were decorated with the Gryffindor colours. "But they can change it back," she spoke in the most vulnerable voice ever. "See," she flicked her wand a couple of times. "Now it will last for 24 hours," both giggled and hurried off.

Hermione put the bottles on the sitting room table and went into the bedroom and collapsed on the bed, laughing along with Severus, who lay down too.

"Song, teapot song," Hermione giggled.

"Teapot song?" Severus laughed. 

"I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up, hear me shout. Just tip me over and pour me out." Both laughed so much that Hermione found it hard to continue. Her face was completely red and Severus's pale cheeks had gotten very much colour too. "I'm a clever teapot, yes it's true. Here's an example of what I can do. I can change my handle to my spout. Just tip me over and pour me out." Hermione sang loudly before they both laughed harder until tears rolled uncontrollably down their cheeks. Hermione and Severus sang the song together while hauling with laughter loudly.

Hermione and Severus crumbled closer to each other and closed their eyes, but only to be bothered by Crookshanks.

"What?" Hermione asked tiredly and opened her eyes. The cat meowed again and Hermione looked at her wristwatch. "Shit!" Hermione gasped surprised and sat up in the bed.

"Wha-?" Asked Severus dimly and sat up too with his messy hair.

"It's sevl... seven twenty-five!" They both flew out of bed.

"Arg!" Hermione shrieked and she nearly fell to the floor due drunkenness. Severus caught her, and fell himself. Both laughed while lying on the floor next to the bed. Hermione managed to get up and she helped Severus to get up too. They both stumbled into the sitting room where they grabbed the bottles to get a sip, forgetting that they were supposed to be sober.

"Think we got a little, tiny itsy bit too much to drink," he giggled and Hermione laughed at him while leaning into his embrace for support.

"Sjust a bit?" Hermione got out of his arms and they "walked" towards the bathroom.

"Ladies first, hurry ups," he leaned up against the wall and Hermione went inside. She took a quick shower just to freshen up and dried her hair, ten minutes later she got out from the bathroom.

"Your turn," she stumbled out of the bathroom and he hurried inside. Hermione felt like everything was blurry. She didn't even walk strait.

"Books," she mumbled and went to her closet to get her books and schoolbag. As she opened the closet door, her head collided with the door. She moaned a bit and rubbed her head before grabbing her bag.

"My head hurts," she informed when Severus came back.

"Alkd.. Lade... Already," he finally managed to say the words correctly, they both giggled.

"No... I collided with the closet door," she complained and rubbed her sore head. Severus let out a sidesplitting laugh. Hermione watched him and then laughed too.

So together they walked towards the Great Hall. They both reeled when walking and both trying their best to be strait.

"You have very red cheeks and very big pupils," Severus informed her as they walked up the staircase from the dungeons.

"You too," she tried to smother a giggle, but with no luck and Severus giggled along.

"Okay, look evil" Severus told himself out loud.

"You're the evil potion master, the students fear you. Chin up and correct robes," Hermione laughed as she corrected his robes. Their foreheads collided and both just giggled. "Off you go," she laughed and watched she he opened the door and tried his best to stride up to the head table. She tried to smother a giggle, but with no luck.

She breathed in and out before she too made her way, carefully, towards the head table. There were a lot of commotion in there and Hermione saw people pointing above the head table where Madam Norris was hanging. The teachers tried to get her down, but Hermione remembered the spell they had cast. The entire Great Hall was still in its different colours, Hermione suppressed a giggle as she took her seat. Albus Dumbledore stood up.

"As you can see," he pointed towards Madam Norris and snicker was heard around in the hall, "someone has decided to play a little prank. Also towards the Great Hall," he gestured around. "Purple and Gryffindor colours..." he chuckled, "I've also been informed that the Slytherin common room has been turned into Gryffindor colours, plus, the suits of armour in one of the hallways has been turned into a herd of sheep," again he chuckled and Hermione swallowed her tongue. What had she done? She bid her lower lip so that she would not laugh. "Unfortunately there's mo way to counter it, but things will, hopefully, return to its normal state within a couple of days." his eyes twinkled at the Slytherin table, they were looking evilly towards the Gryffindor table.

"Albus, do you think it is someone from my house?" Minerva asked before glancing towards the Gryffindor table. Hermione let out an uncharacteristic giggle and Minerva looked at her surprised. "I know you know who did this..." she spoke sharply.

"Minerva my dear, time will tell," he spoke and Hermione swore she saw him looking at her for a second.

"Had a nice sleep?" McGonagall had turned towards Hermione interested. Severus gave a small girlish giggle that was supposed to, apparently, be in disguise as a cough. All the teachers looked at him, and Hermione did her best not to giggle herself, but did not succeed. Both sat giggling in their seats while trying to disguise their laughter with their napkins, but they were literally shaking with suppressed laughter.

"Y-Yes..." She managed to finally say between almost mute giggles.

"Good, no troubles like yesterday's night?" Dumbledore had apparently not noticed Severus laughing or anything else. Hermione looked out the corner of her eye and saw Severus doing the same as she, avoiding every ones gaze.

"No, no. I was very interesting, I mean peaceful, slept like a baby," Hermione corrected and smiled happily before getting her napkin to hide her broad smile.

"What about you, Severus?" Minerva asked innocently and Hermione turned her head towards Severus who sat stiff in his chair.

"Yes, fantastic like always," he smiled greatly and resumed his breakfast. Hermione noticed a lot of people stare at him, not only the teachers. The man had just smiled greatly. Hermione giggled and Severus snorted with laughter and Hermione followed his lead. Tears fell down her cheek and the teachers sat looking at both Severus and Hermione who was trying to hide their laughter, but with no whatsoever success. Severus rose from his seat quickly and hurried to leave by using one of the doors behind the Head table. Hermione giggled extensively and hid her face in her hands.

"Hermione are you feeling fine?" Professor Sprout asked. Hermione was still laughing like a mad and tried hiding her face in her hands.

"Y-hihi-es..." she giggled and tried to control herself. She dried her eyes.

"Hey Mione," someone spoke and Hermione began instinctively to giggle again.

"Hey," she managed to greet Harry and Ron. Before giggling quietly.

"Are you okay?" Ron asked looking at his friend with extremely red cheeks. Hermione got out her timetable form her bag, just reaching for it made her dizzy, and she felt her cheeks getting even more warm than they already was.

"Great, I just needs to find the right schoolbooks for today..." Severus came back from wherever he had gone and took his seat again.

"Hermione it's Saturday," Harry informed her and Hermione looked up.

"That means I'm not going to school today," she said dimly. Severus hid his face, pretending to have some kind of headache-seizure. Hermione could see he was laughing and she bid her lip tightly. 

"Yes, that means you don't have to go to school today..." Harry helped her with the information, which was too much for Severus who stood up right away and nearly ran to the door and disappeared through it.

"Was he laughing?" Ron asked thunderstruck. Hermione was smiling broadly.

"Of course not, Sev don't laugh," she let out a titter and Ron nearly collapsed.

"Sev? You're calling him..." before Ron could say more Hermione interrupted him. 

"Oh Ron! Don't be such a..." she giggled again and got up from her seat, "troll..." she waved goodbye and hurried past them. She hurried between the tables and left the Great Hall. Once outside she broke into giggles and hurried towards the dungeons and her new quarters. She put down her schoolbag and just as she had did so, Severus entered, still smiling rather broadly.

"I... I just couldn't stop laughing! I called Ron a troll!" Hermione laughed and Severus joined. He nodded in a silent agree and they collapsed on the bed together. With a few minutes between they both giggled and then fell silent until the silence became too much for this funny situation, and they would laugh hysterically again. Finally after an hour of so, the pair was crumbled together under the sheets of the bed, sleeping soundly.


End file.
